Posted by taizou at 2015-04-23 02:13:25 Site news
Some of you may have noticed the lack of posts here since, ooh, a year ago. A large part of the reason for that is I don’t like writing a blog post about a thing unless I can cover the thing totally comprehensively, which always feels like a huge undertaking when it’s something like a console with 200 games built in, and I’ve decided I want to take a screenshot of every single one of them, delve into the history of the company that made it, take photos of it from every angle and do a bunch of other stuff on top of that. But with that coupled to my limited free time lately, it just seems overwhelming and I end up never doing it. Which is not ideal! Because I think this stuff is interesting and I want to share my knowledge about it with the world - I don’t want to turn into some cranky old dude with an attic full of weird shit that nobody else knows or cares about. I want to turn into some cranky old dude with an attic full of weird shit that a handful of people on the internet know about!
To that end, I’m launching my new project - unimaginatively called Super Multi Notes, because I literally can’t name things for shit - which is basically a single-editor wiki for my own discoveries, notes, pictures and other stuff. The idea behind this is, when I find something interesting, I can immediately create a page for it there with some basic details - instead of putting it aside for a blog post I will never write - and flesh out the article later, as and when I have time to do so (or when I make relevant new discoveries). Like any wiki, every page will always be a work in progress, and some will no doubt reach more advanced stages of progress than others; it’s entirely possible some will consist solely of a title followed by "uuuuugh" and/or a string of random characters and/or expletives. But at least you’ll have that title!
It's running on MediaWiki software (as used by Wikipedia, Wikia and like 98% of other wikis) with the Semantic MediaWiki extension installed, which will hopefully allow me to make more interesting use of data than I could otherwise. It's also using a completely new theme; this is still very much in beta, so please let me know if you encounter any problems or have any feedback.
While (for now at least) I’ll be the only person allowed to edit the wiki pages proper, anyone is welcome to leave comments on articles or edit discussion pages. I’m also releasing the whole thing under a Creative Commons license, so you can reuse the content in other wikis or sites, provided you give credit.
Does all that mean this blog is dead? I hope not! I just have to decide what I want to do with it now. Maybe I’ll highlight interesting things from the wiki here, or use it for more in-depth articles that don’t really lend themselves to wiki format, or something else entirely. But whatever I do or don’t do with this blog, hopefully the wiki will be an experiment that pays off.
Posted by taizou at 2014-05-17 01:33:57 Clones
Hey, it's been a while! Sorry about that. But I'm back! With one of the countless weird handhelds that are cluttering up my house at the moment... the PGP 256!
With super high game! And Bowser! I do quite like this package design, though. I like purple. And I've always had a soft spot for that font they used for the "256M Handheld Game System" text. Hey and the "256" is in Georgia and it's rainbow coloured, both of which featured heavily in, like, every website I made in the late 2000s. Whoever designed this package is totally after my own heart. Or maybe it was designed by me in 2008 on some alternate timeline and it somehow crossed over into this world in some freak convergence of universes (thus explaining why I've never seen another one for sale). Whoa.
The back... is sadly more generic. Screenshots of games that mostly aren't actually on here, more stolen artwork and some text which mostly actually is true and makes sense (aside from the game counts).
So! If you haven't guessed, this is one of many (many) clone handhelds doing the rounds at present, which each claim to have hundreds of thousands of games built in (all lies, of course) and come with one to three cartridges boasting equally ridiculous game counts.
The history of these is pretty messy; my original understanding is that they were derived from and compatible with the FC-3000 from Jungletac, a handheld capable of playing Famicom games on its own proprietary cartridge format, but (for reasons I'll get into later) this obviously isn't the case, at least not anymore.
One of the earliest such consoles was pretty much a knockoff of Jungletac's OneStation, albeit called the "Digital Dragon system" on the packaging and "MagicStation" on the console itself (although possibly some earlier revisions still said "OneStation"), and the built-in games menu resembled one from a OneStation cart. Later came the GB Station series which resembled the GBA SP, and then the PSP-imitating PVP (Play Vision Portable) Station which set the standard for dozens of P(something)P consoles to follow. To begin with they were all Famicom clones, but later Mega Drive clones were produced in the same format, and there are even a few GBA-based ones doing the rounds now.
This one is a Famicom clone and follows resolutely in the PVP's footsteps, going for the name "PGP" and taking its inspiration more from the PS Vita (although it isn't an exact copy, I'll give them that much) but the manufacturers have also opted to add a cute sticker featuring all manner of copyrighted characters (both it and the screen are covered by a plastic protector with a bad habit of falling off). Other variants are available if this one isn't your bag; you can see a few more on this alibaba page, including a snazzy Tekken vs Fist of the North Star edition.
The screen is actually one of the better ones I've seen on anything; inevitably it doesn't run at the native NES resolution so there's a bit of stretching going on, but it's nice and bright and actually puts the LCDs of considerably more expensive and legitimate hardware to shame. But, sadly, of course, this is a clone, so it can't all be good news, and the fatal flaw here is the sound. Honestly I'm not sure if I have a faulty unit, or if they're all this bad; it's just really scratchy and distorted and unpleasant, even through headphones.
Unlike many similar consoles, this doesn't come with an AV cable and has no TV-out support whatsoever, so you're limited to playing it on the console's screen; it uses a rechargeable battery compatible with Nokia's BL-5C (which has become something of a standard among Chinese console makers lately) and there's a dubious charger included, although fortunately it has a standard Mini USB port so you can charge it from something more reputable. There was also a pouch included in the box, which is, you know, nice.
There was a manual included as well, but it's both for the wrong console (something called a "PYP 3", although the text refers to a "16 bit NBS" as well) and in Indonesian, so it's not too much use to me... except for the sticker on the front, which reveals the company behind this to be "KSD", short for 凯仕达 (Kaishida), short for 深圳市凯仕达高峰科技有限公司 (Shenzhen Kaishida Summit Technology Co., Ltd.), and also provides the URL of their (musical, be warned) website. Kaishida seems to mostly specialise in dance mats, and they don't list anything like this at all anymore, so it's probably fair to say Kaishida had nothing to do with the system aside from maybe the package design.
Who actually did make it is something of a mystery; many of these systems can be found listed on the website of Shenzhen Nanjing Technology, of Famicom RPG infamy, from the common GB Station and PVP lines to more original stuff like the Game Prince and NJ series, plus the amusingly-named "NBS" which shook things up a bit by ripping off Nintendo's DS instead of the commonly cloned PSP family. However many of those consoles also appear on the website of Jncota among other companies, so it's really hard to say where they originated from in the first place; and in any case neither company's site lists anything like the PGP. The company whose Alibaba page I linked to previously, Guangzhou Toycenter Toy Firm (which uses the brands Digiking and Zhanglong), seems to be a distributor for all kinds of handhelds including those known to be from other manufacturers, so I doubt they're behind it; but they may have had something to do with its design. who knows!
Regardless of who made it, they were generous enough to bundle the console with three tiny cartridges:
Of course, they don't have anywhere near the stated game count (and neither does the console itself) but it's nice that they were included, right? Here's a hastily shot video of one of the menus (and yes the sound really is that bad, it's not a problem with the video):
The other menus have different graphics but identical music and animation. And there's a reason for that! A reason that will become apparent if you take a look inside the cartridges:
...but there's... nothing here?
that's right! These so-called "cartridges" are nothing more than a trigger for different, already-built-in sets of games! Are you shocked? I was shocked. No wonder they're called "Exclusive Card"s - if you tried to use them with another, ostensibly pin-compatible console (of which there are many), nothing would happen! Or rather, they might trigger other sets of built-in games on those consoles, but you aren't going to be playing the PGP's games on your PXP or PZP or P☆P, because they are forever trapped within the confines of the PGP. And I always wondered why no one was selling cartridges for such a seemingly prevalent bootleg gaming format; because the cartridges are all LIES, that's why.
I actually have seen cartridges sold separately labelled as "GB Station", so it's possible some earlier, similar systems really did have real cartridges containing honest-to-god ROM chips before they resorted to this kind of trickery; hell, maybe the newer ones still have this functionality, and real carts just use different pins to the fake ones. Probably not, though.
So, now we've established Santa isn't real... but we can at least take a look at the contents of his sack. And by that I mean the games on here. Of course. I'll list the unique games built-in and those "on" each "cartridge", but obviously I'm not listing the 100,000s of repeats each time, because that would just be silly.
- SUPER MARIO 3
- PLANTS VS ZOMBIE
- JACKIE CHAN
- 10 YARD FIGHT
- 90 TANK
- ANTARCTIC ADVEN
- BALLOON FIGHT
- BASE BALL
- BINARY LAND
- BIRD WEEK
- BOMBER MAN
- BOMB SWEEPER
- BRUSH ROLLER
So the "666666 in 1" games built in turns out to be a more modest 18; of interest here are Nice Code's ports of Angry Birds and Plants vs Zombies, plus one other random game of theirs, "Warrior" (which I can't find a video of but it's basically a reskinned version of this one). Super Mario Bros 3 is the hacked version which lets you give yourself any item, which makes it considerably easier; we also have CrossFire, an obscure old Famicom game by Kyugo which has gained a sudden resurgence in bootleg popularity lately thanks to the identically-named online game, and homebrew game Bomb Sweeper which seems to have made its way into multicart makers' romsets probably thanks to its close stylistic resemblance to early Nintendo titles.
- CONTRA 1
- CONTRA 2
- FINAL MISSION
- BAYOU BILLY
- ISOLATED WARRIOR
- BURGER TIME
- CHACK AND POP
- CIRCUS CHARLIE
- CLU CLU LAND
- DEVIL WORLD
- DIG DUG 1
- DONKEY KONG 1
- DONKEY KONG 2
The "777777 in 1" (real count: 17) is more standard, although Bayou Billy isn't often seen on multicarts. "Chess" is really Gomoku Narabe and "Donkey Kong 2" is Donkey Kong Jr, if anyone was wondering.
- DARKWING DUCK
- SUMMER CARNIVAL
- POWER BLADE
- POWER BLADE 2
- TURTLES 4
- RAID ON BUNGELIN
- HYPER OLYMPIC
- HYPER SPORTS
- ICE CLIMBER
- LODE RUNNER
- LUNAR BALL
- MAGIC JEWELRY
The "888888 in 1" really has 18 games and WHOA HEY IT'S RECCA just sitting there in the list as "Summer Carnival" like it's nothing. That game alone totally makes this thing worthwhile.
- DOUBLE DRAGON 2
- CHIP & DALE 1
- TINY TOON
- GUN DEC
- TOP GUN
- KILLER TOMATOES
- ADVENTURE ISLAN
- DONKEY KONG 3
- DONKEY KONG JR
- EXCITE BIKE
- F1 RACE
- FORMATION Z
- FRONT LINE
Finally, the "999999 in 1" (real count: 19). "Guifwar" is an Iraq war-themed hack of Silk Worm I've mentioned before here; everything else is pretty standard. (Donkey Kong Jr is DK Jr. Math, by the way.)
So, that's the PGP! A slightly unusual variant in a sea of generic PSP knockoffs, and probably not something I'd recommend buying - unless you really really want to play Recca on the cheap - but it's cute and interesting (you know, just like me) it's just let down by its piss-poor sound and inherent lack of expandability (again, just like... me?). Next up: something else!
Posted by taizou at 2014-03-17 00:02:25 Hummer Software
, Plug & play
Well it's finally time for the final part of this strangest of plug & play consoles; what mysteries will it hold? what will be revealed? (spoiler: there are some games)
But first - I mentioned previously that I didn't think Sunnyflyer was really the manufacturer of this thing; back when I got it I did a little bit more digging into its origins and I
found another Taiwanese company called "Jempire" with basically the same console in black, among other things (including a cute Famicom-style plug & play controller).
I also came across a Hong Kong company called Wattly International, sometimes also known as Wingtech, which may have
been the original source of it judging from the model number (WI16-JP020). but all these companies seem to be defunct which makes it
quite hard to get to the bottom of all this! For now I'm going to assume it's a Wattly/Wingtech product though, possibly separately distributed in Taiwan by Jempire and Sunnyflyer (or maybe Sunnyflyer was working with Jempire), and one that I guess was not very successful for anyone.
Now to the second half of the games:
- Hit Brick - Like Arkanoid, but... the paddle is a sandwich, and the power-ups are drink cans. Of course.
- Math - As you might expect from the name, this one has you doing simple math(s) against a time limit. Which makes this console educational. You know, for the kids.
- Maze Car - Rally-X clone! (What with this and Bosconian I did wonder if the developers have any connection to one of the Namco plug & play systems, but the most likely candidate was actually developed by the UK-based HotGen, so I guess not)
- Moon Tank - A Pang clone set on the moon (or a moon, I guess) featuring some kind of robot tank thing and an interesting arrangement of the Charlie's Angels theme tune, because why not
- Motorboat - Pretty standard racing game, but quite a well-done one; the water seems to be rendered with a SNES Mode 7-style effect which no other game here makes use of. [update: of course you probably noticed it features jetskis, not motorboats, but I'll forgive them for that mistake since it gave them the opportunity to animate a jetskier's arse in some detail]
- Poker - Not poker. Just a high/low card game. Western-style playing cards are often just referred to as "poker" in Chinese though, which is probably where the misleading name comes from.
- Span - A sort of endless runner type thing, only not endless, because there are defined levels and such. Still, it's fun, and it came at least a year before before Canabalt and various mobile games kicked off the current craze for these things; it's probably one of my favourite games on here.
- Shooting Ball - Just a bland Puzzle Bobble clone. The most interesting thing that happens is sometimes some butterflies fly across the screen. Which I didn't even capture in the screenshot.
- Shoot Birds - The sort of game which obviously would be a million times better with a lightgun, but came out after LCD TVs became widespread so it couldn't really use one. Also you're shooting at these cute little tweeting sparrows, which seems a bit harsh :(
- Spin - Slots. With, it must be said, an unusual and realistically-rendered selection of fruit.
- Tank - Battle Ci.. oh no wait that's not this one. This is a game where you have to shoot at approaching tanks, and it's also a little bit reminiscent of possible Hummer Software creation Iraq War 2003 (albeit simplified).
- Tank War - Oh THIS is the Battle City clone. It's decent enough at being a Battle City clone, which is lucky, because that's exactly what it is.
- Top Ball - you're this fortunately helmet-clad person, and you have to bounce balls on your head to get them into a bucket. Because, you know. Those balls need to be in that bucket. Don't even question it. (This is also the only game without the ability to exit from the pause menu, which is irritating)
- Treasure Brick - A Columns clone which very blatantly uses a stock sound effect of a door closing when you drop a column.
- Triangle Plane - A very literal name for a decent clone of Asteroids, complete with pseudo-vector graphics.
A couple of people requested this, so I've recorded some music from this console; I didn't spend much time editing or anything, and there are sound effects where it was unavoidable (step forward Tank War) but if you just want an idea of what some of the games sound like, you can download that here. I probably was overdoing it a bit saying some of the games sounded Mega Drive-like; it really doesn't sound much like any other console I've ever heard, but maybe someone out there can identify if it's based on some other sound chip or not.
[update: it's come to my attention that the music in Elevator is Money for Nothing by Dire Straits; what with that and Charlie's Angels it's looking very possible that more of the music on here was ripped off from somewhere. Hummer Software did actually make a MIDI converter for the EMG, based on Tomsoft's previous one for the Mega Drive, so maybe they just found MIDIs online and converted them for use in the games]
Before I wrap this up, one interesting thing I was able to salvage from Jempire's website before it went down was this list of what I can only assume to be all the Hummer Software EMG games available up to that point, complete with screenshots. There are a bunch there not available on this or any other console I've seen; I'm naturally intrigued by "Driller Man" as a potential Mr. Driller clone (North Salvation, you have competition!) and there are a few other interesting things to be found, like how Labyrinth looks pretty much like Nice Code's Burrow Explorer (credit to codeman38 for spotting that one waayy back in 2011) which would almost make sense given that Nice Code was founded by ex-Dragon people too.
Some of the screenshots even seem to be of earlier or alternate versions of the games to the ones found on this console; for example, the 3D Bean guy has his original colouring from Harry Potter, Elevator has the cavemen asking for "(number) floor" instead of just "number", and Bosconian still has the original arcade graphics.
Anyway - this brings the saga of the Sunnyflyer 30 in 1 to an end, for now, so I should probably draw some conclusions: while I'm not overly fond of the design of the console itself, the games are mostly quite fun, and while the production values are sometimes shaky they (with a couple of exceptions) aren't reliant on stolen material; my official supermulti.org plug & play rating is "better than some of the crap out there, and probably deserved to do better than it did". Out of ten.
Posted by taizou at 2014-03-02 02:46:16 Hummer Software
, Plug & play
So, back to the Sunnyflyer 30 in 1 16-bit plug & play controller thing - turn it on and you'll see this lovely menu:
It's certainly a menu. And it omits all spaces in the game names for some reason. There's also a volume option, which is rendered slightly
useless by the fact that some sounds are distorted at any level above 1, and it defaults to
(At least the games allow you to exit back to the main menu from the pause screen, which is
a nice touch as it preserves the volume setting)
Before I show you the games, wouldn't you like to know who developed them? yes? maybe? well!
It's not entirely straightforward; no one is actually credited anywhere,
but I've done a bit of research and I'm fairly sure they were made by the Xi'an-based
developer Hummer Software (蜂鸟软件; no relation to Hummer Team, mind you), founded by ex-members of
Dragon Co after that company
closed. (Dragon itself actually has quite an interesting history which I'd like to get into
sometime!) Their archived website can be found here, and although the screenshots, videos and demos once hosted there are sadly long gone,
it does mention them having developed games for the EMG series; there are also a few other game-specific connections which I'll get to later.
In 2007 they were bought by the Taiwanese company Prescope and renamed Promexus Software, and under that
guise made some games for the "iGo", "eGo" and "P-eye"/"PI" consoles, which were released
under the Sharky brand in Russia as the Sharky
3D, Sharky Touch and Sharky Move respectively - on the Sharky site you can see that a few of
the games on the former two consoles were recycled from this thing (albeit ported I guess,
as the hardware is different). However Promexus's own website seems to have vanished, along
with the official download site for those consoles, and all that remains are some odd
listings for "Promexus Trading"
seemingly moving into the export of hair straighteners (btw bonus points for "Main
Customers: Gorgeous", flattery will get you everywhere) so I guess in the end it didn't work
So now you have a vague idea who made them; on to some games! The first five games on here are the only ones with title screens, plus (more or less) the only ones
out of alphabetical order, so presumably these are supposed to be either newer or better
ones, and the rest are generally more simple/generic (but not always).
- Lion Roar - Hey remember how the first game on that one
handheld was a Puzzloop/Zuma clone? Well! Here's another. Does the job. The lion of the
title is actually a Chinese
guardian lion statue, by the way.
- Battle Front - Like Cabal, or possibly Space Invaders from a different perspective (or even more like its
obscure PS2 sequel Space Invaders:
Invasion Day). you control a guy who can move along the bottom of the screen and shoot
the various robots and such that are attacking you. It's not bad - there are a variety of
powerups and even bosses and stuff.
- Bubble Man - A hybrid of Bomberman and Bubble Bobble; the basic gameplay is Bomberman-ish, but instead of
bombs you drop bubbles which trap your opponents, and then you defeat them by bursting them Bubble
Bobble-style. There's even a hint of Sokoban in there in that you can push the crates
around. And frankly any game that lets you ride a giant snail (which slows you down but
offers protection from attacks, naturally) is OK with me.
- Goal - Slightly more in-depth take on the sort of penalty kick game you often see on Wii knockoffs
and other sportier inhabitants of the plug & play genre. You have three players to choose
from, "Barlack", "Ziden" and "Ronaldnio", and with the help of a few powerups you have
to score a goal past increasingly tricky walls of opposing players. and repeat.
- Shooting King - Some of you may remember a PS1 game called Gekioh: Shooting King. This has absolutely nothing to do with that and in
fact there was no reason whatsoever for me to bring it up just now (except that it's pretty
cool). Actually the shooting is of the basketball variety, and that guy is the king of
- 1945 - Hummer Software picking up where Capcom left off! This is a vertical shootemup, as you can probably tell, and it's pretty decent. It also bears a resemblance to some of the games on the 16-bit variant of the "Air Blaster" plug & play by ABL, so maybe there's a connection there... Also it has a short loop of (likely stolen) sampled music, in contrast to the mostly original(?) and/or public-domain music found in the other games.
- 3D Bean - Well this is... this is just... it's the Mega Drive Harry Potter game, isn't it? The player character is now a random enemy from that game, and there are fewer enemies and less variety in general (and original music), but basically it's the same thing. The Mega Drive version was also listed on Hummer Software's website at some point, in case anyone was doubting their involvement here.
- Sonic X - Sonic? Well, not really. Going back to Hummer Software's website, though, it does mention a Sonic game for the EMG series, so I suppose... this is it? I mean, I guess the environments sort of look like Sonic if Sonic were a mid-90s shareware PC game, and it has those springy things and enemies you can jump on... but the character isn't Sonic and it's not in any way fast. Also the background music being a sedate rendition of "The Entertainer" doesn't exactly do anything for the sense of speed.
- Apaqi - The 1945 engine strikes again. With a different sampled music loop this time. And I think they were going for "apache".
- Blackjack - Exactly what it says it is. are you surprised?
- Bomber - Another variation on Bomberman, this one sticks to more or less straightforward Bomberman gameplay only with more mazelike level layouts instead of the original's grids.
- Bosconian - Literally just a surprisingly faithful port of Namco's Bosconian. The sprites are updated a bit and the "condition" thing is gone (although it still has the "alert! alert!" voice clips) but otherwise it's the same. A strange one, considering the other games on here are more or less original.
- China Brick - Tetris! Chinese Tetris. Why should Russia get all the Tetris action... just because they invented it or something?
- Elevator - oh you know, just your standard caveman elevator operator simulation game. You operate an elevator, cavemen get on and tell you which floor they want to go to, and you have to take them there, where they'll be replaced by other cavemen who want to go to new and exciting floors. If you take them to the wrong floor they swear at you and it's game over. Just like real life.
- Golf - fairly self-explanatory. Some of the graphics here are ripped from Neo Turf Masters, because apparently it's obligatory for every single golf game on a 16-bit plug & play console ever to use Neo Turf Masters graphics.
I'll cover the next 15 games in the next post; but before I end things, just a note on sound (as someone asked about it in the comments of a previous post, and it's a major aspect of the games that, uhm, quite obviously doesn't come across in screenshots) I can't say any of the music is too interesting composition-wise, but the sound hardware really seems quite unique compared to the usual fare on these consoles - sometimes it comes across quite generically MIDI-ish but other games have a bit of a Mega Drive-esque FM sound to them. (I'd say it might have something to do with Hummer Software's experience as a Mega Drive developer, but all their MD games I can find just use sampled sound exclusively, so maybe not)
Anyway, that's it for now - look out for the thrilling conclusion... some other time!
Posted by taizou at 2014-02-27 01:18:03 Hummer Software
, Plug & play
So I've covered a cart-based handheld, an all-in-one handheld, a multicart and a clone; you may be wondering at this point, is there an area of obscure low-budget Chinese console gaming I haven't yet poked my nose into? why yes of course there are several of them. but today I'll be taking a look into the magical world of the plug & play controller, a class of devices that predated (and have now been mostly displaced by) those aforementioned all-in-one handhelds.
These began as straightforward Famicom clones which took advantage of smaller NES-on-a-chip hardware to dispense with the console and squeeze the whole package into a controller which plugged directly into your TV; possibly one of the first was the early/mid-90s IQ-901 from famiclone pioneers Micro Genius but the form was later popularised in the late 90s by the interminable N64 controller lookalikes like the Mega Joy and Super Joy and Power Joy (and probably some other types of joy), all of which came bundled with collections of very much unauthorised copies of old NES games.
It was only around the early 2000s that plug & plays transcended the bootleg nature of the early stuff and went legit; in China the likes of Jungletac would start developing their own original games for Famicom-based systems, later branching out into more capable hardware from Sunplus and others, while in the US and Japan various companies got in on the act with a string of licensed releases.
The one I've got here is a later example, running a rarely seen type of 16-bit hardware. I've decided to split it into a few posts, as it has quite a lot of games and I'm going to screenshot the whole lot (not least because it's much easier to take screenshots from something with TV-out than the handheld I covered previously) - in this post I'll just cover the packaging and console.
So it's the Sunnyflyer 30 in 1 16-bit... thing! It also has a name in Japanese, ゲーム悍な将; ゲーム quite straightforwardly means "game" but as far as I can tell 悍な将 makes no sense, so there's that.
Sunnyflyer was based in Taiwan and spent most of its life as a maker of model planes - I have no idea why they decided to get into game consoles, but they did (albeit probably only rebranding from other manufacturers), and then seemingly went out of business shortly after. A lot of their old stock ended up on Taobao; there's a Sunnyflyer Famiclone that crops up there sometimes, and I've also seen a lone dance mat on a Taiwanese auction site.
The back has a game list in traditional Chinese - this important information being in Chinese does kind of betray that the Japanese text all over the front is just for show (if that wasn't already apparent from it making no sense), and the console was probably intended for the Taiwanese market all along.
The top of the box identifies it as a "plus & play" system and illustrates a flipped version of the system plugged into a clipart CRT TV, and there's even more (probably nonsensical or stolen) Japanese text.
And the bottom, with manufacturer/distributor details and such.
The other two sides just have some screenshots of the games on here, which I'll be showing you later anyway, but have these as a ...preview, I guess.
There's also the repeated text "EMG 2008 30 in 1 user gnide" which, aside from being misspelt and entirely out of place, handily reveals the year this thing was made and the hardware it runs; "EMG" is the series of game systems-on-chips made by Elan Microelectronics, the latest of which is EMG2000a, but this might use an older one.
So that's about it for the box - let's take a look at the console:
it is... a fairly ugly thing, to be honest. Control layout is quite standard - there's a little faux-analogue stick and a D-pad, plus A, B, X and Y buttons (though I have no idea if the X and Y buttons are mapped separately internally or they're just wired to A and B as is common on similar consoles - certainly no games on here do anything unique with them).
4 AA batteries go in the back, in that bulge which also helpfully makes it quite uncomfortable to hold. The battery life seems decent enough - it would be nice if you could use an AC adapter instead, but that's not the way of these things.
Anyway! That's the externals covered (there was also an instruction sheet in the box that I forgot to take a photo of, but it is both uninteresting, brief and in Chinese so you aren't missing much), next up I'll get onto the games - stay tuned!